May 15, 1998, 8:00pm

So did anyone else catch the Seinfeld send off on Thursday? Sure you did. I have a couple of observations about it, and they will only make sense if you saw the show, so if you truly didn't, my apologies, and maybe you should scroll down a bit.

First things first. I think one of the reasons why people like the show so much is because there has always been the sense that, yah, I know someone like that, or yah, I've done that. Maybe not the masturbation bet, but you know what I mean. Who among us doesn't know an Elaine? (Heck, I've known several shallow, egotistical and short women in my life). How many of us don't know a George? I'll admit, Kramer's a bit out there, but I've known a few "schemers" in my time.

As for the stuff they do, especially the things that were brought to light in the trial, well, I'm sure that most people have done similar things. Haven't you ever sat in a bar with your buddies and laughed at the socialization skills of some person you're all watching? Anyway, the point here is, even though the characters in Seinfeld are pretty mean spirited, callous, and extremely shallow, I think that we all identify with at least some of the things they do. Think of them as our evil brother Skippy or something.

So where am I going with this? Well, I think the trial was a bit of a farce, and even though it was gratifying for the Seinfeld crew to get what they deserved for being such mean people, I still wonder... if it was you, or me, or your friends and family, or mine, would we be able to go through such a court session without having people from our past coming up on the stand saying how bad we were, what evil things we did? I think that my court date might last weeks!

The observation I have is that I think we collectively as viewers got hosed big time. Remember how the press in the last week or two constantly covered the last Seinfeld episode? How the newspapers, the tv shows, the radio shows etc etc tried to "guess" at what the last episode's secret plot would be? In the last week, I remember seeing on TV, the following predictions: they all die, they move to California, Jerry and Elaine marry, someone gets killed, they get their show, they go to jail, George and Jerry do it.

Well, lets cover this one by one:

• They all die: when Kramer caused the jet to almost crash, it looked like they were all going to die.
  
• They move to California: This one came true, almost, when Jerry and George got signed on to do their show.
  
• Jerry and Elaine Marry: Elaine was about to tell Jerry that she loved him still, when they thought they were going to die in a plane crash.
  
• Someone gets killed: Did you catch the scene of Susan (George's dead fiance)'s Dad buying the gun?
  
• They get their show: They did get their show finally...
  
• They go to jail: Well, this one did happen.
  
• George and Jerry make out: Didn't happen, but there's still time... prison makes ya horny, Billy!
  
  

Am I the only one that thinks that the press collectively decided to have a little fun with the public, by tossing out all these so-called predictions when they really knew the ending? I mean, every prediction I read sort of happened in the show. Since the last episode was recorded over a month ago, Seinfeld and the other writers couldn't have modeled the script based on what they were reading in the press.

Not that it's a big deal, not that there's anything wrong with that! I just think that someone was pulling the wool over our eyes, and it was the entire press corps covering the last Seinfeld episode! They knew! They knew!

If you missed the Seinfeld last show (like that nerd Jean did - she watched Xena instead!!! As if it's not on enough times a week.) then you can read the rest of this rant!)

Looks like I'm off to Chicago again, which is kind of neat. I booked my tix today, but to get a cheaper fare, I have to stay over a Saturday. Why? Because you see, airlines, just like too many other businesses these days, like to take advantage of people. Most people travelling on business tend to travel during the week only... So airlines as a group nab you over this little scam - if your return flight doesn't span a Saturday, the price is pretty much double. Originally, I was going to fly on a Monday, returning on a Friday, but if I did that, the ticket price was close to $1500 plus taxes!!! Now, I'm flying on a Saturday and returning on a Thursday and the ticket price is down to $800, which is still high, but I'm flying in the high season supposedly, so that's the price that has to be paid.

It won't be so bad though. Saturday night and Sunday I'll be hanging with a friend in Chicago (who happens to also work for the company I'm doing business with), so that will be cool - maybe we can catch a Cubs game or something... and then I'll be checking into a hotel on Monday, staying there till I leave.

I hear Chicago has been pretty darned hot this past week, I hope it won't be too bad when I'm there. One thing I really do plan to do is go sit in the bleachers for one Cubs game if I can. Just to say I did it. I didn't get to see a Bulls game last time I was there, so this time around it's Da Cubs...

And as usual, I am again typing this from my newest favouritist coffee place, Bean Around the World. They have the fireplace going today, which I'm not totally crazy about sitting beside, but heck, it's still a cool place. Right now, there's four people in the place besides the staff - a guy sitting next to me on the couch, with a huge backpack - looks like a hosteller making an extended pit stop. Across from me is a pretty amazing looking woman who seems to be learning English. The other two people in the place are sitting near the front of the café, so I can't see them too well.

I'm waiting on my friend Bernie, who looks like he might not show up, so I think I'll wrap up for now, make a phone call, get one more cuppa, and read my book.

Thanks for stopping by... till next time...

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Mixelania

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