May 11, 1998, 8:10pm

I've been thinking about some pretty weird things lately. One particular topic is something I don't think they have a name for, so I invented a name: comparative experience. Most people who've moved from a small town to a large one, or vice versa will know what this is about. Heck, even moving from a medium town to a large one gives you this feeling.

For instance: in the city I grew up in, our bus service was very efficient - it went everywhere, and the buses ran frequently. They even built a network of about 80 kilometers of bus only roads, complete with tunnels, bridges, everything to ensure this route didn't have to cross (at the same level) any public road. But there were a couple of bad things about our bus service. Number one, the bus drivers, among the highest paid in our country, were collectively a surely bunch. Not the pleasant types. No, they were the types who pointed at the "Don't Speak to Driver" sign if you asked them a question. And loathe the moment you might be short a few nickels or dimes when boarding the bus - tough luck buddy, you're outta my bus.

Number two, the security service for the bus system was brutal, as in goon squad. In Ottawa, it seems all the goofs who didn't pass the Police Exams, or were rejected because they were narcissistic idiots would get jobs with OC Transpo Security, or as we fondly called them - OC Gestapo. Remember that private, bus only transitway network I mentioned above? Well the system obviously has to have a lot of access to public roads so buses can serve neighbourhoods... and it also means that in the summer, when Ottawa turns into tourist central, a lot of tourists in their rental cars wander onto the transitway. The OC Gestapo love this, as witnessed by their various car hiding spots along the transitway. As soon as some hapless tourist turns onto the roadway, vrooom here comes the OC Gestapo, armed with their baton flashlights and ticket books - and let me tell you, if they could have guns, they would. You're a tourist? Oh too bad - you should have read that sign over there that says no cars - that sign - can't you see it? The small little thing behind that garbage can!

Anyway, to sum up, I came from a town with excellent bus service and schedules, fast transport (thanks to the transitway) but really really mean drivers and overzealous security personnel.

So when I arrived in Vancouver, I noticed a huge difference. First day off the Greyhound bus, I had to take a city bus to North Vancouver to get to my hostel. Loaded down with my huge backpack, I expected no help from the transit guy (especially after experiencing the even worse European bus drivers!) but as I got on the bus, I asked my questions, and the driver was very, very helpful - he even waited till I had my bulky pack off before pulling away. The guy was smiling, and talked to me about travelling, until I got to the Seabus terminal where he promptly described how to walk through the terminus to catch the seabus. I jumped off the bus to his friend "good luck!"

Must be a fluke I thought. But it wasn't. Over the years, I've found Vancouver bus drivers to be very friendly, and the few times I was short change (and one time where I only had a dollar and a 20 dollar bill), the bus drivers let it slide, with a friendly "next time you're on a bus, put the extra money in, ok?" All in all, it's been an eye opener for me. As for the bus service itself, I find that Vancouver, especially the other towns around Vancouver like Richmond, Delta, Burnaby etc etc suffer from poor and sporadic bus service. For a town with over double the general population that Ottawa does, Vancouver has maybe 2/3rds the buses that my old town had. If you want to get from the North Shore to Delta, and it isn't afternoon rush hour, be prepared for a 3+ hour marathon and long waits at multiple transfers.

So, lets sum up again - Vancouver - excellent bus drivers, friendly, courteous, helpful, but bad routes, not enough buses, long waits and transfers. Ottawa - almost the complete opposite in every category.

And that's my experience, but now let's take a comparitive service. One comment I've heard a lot in Vancouver is how mean the drivers are. I guess I think I hear it a lot because all the times I've heard it, I've remembered it - mainly because my experience is so opposite. This is a comparitve experience - people who grew up with this one experience have nothing to compare it too, so the slightest thing, the one negative experience might cloud their reactions when someone asks, "so are bus drivers friendly". Because I've lived in multiple cities, and multiple cultures in fact, I have a comparative experience that lets me balance one experience against the other, and thus lets me judge any of them.

But I am not immune to the other side of comparative experience - after all, I can honestly say I haven't met a surly bus driver yet, but what happens if I meet three in a week once? Will my own experience recollection change?

We studied this in anthropology, but not in such an exact way. There may well be an anthropological term for it, may well be some anthropological experts in this very study, but I don't know about them. All I know is that when others talk about how rude the drivers here are, or how poor the bus service in Ottawa is, I can only smile and think to myself "if only they really knew..."

And now, in a shameless attempt to generate more email, tell me, have you had any comparative experiences? Or is everything in you life experience based on one place, one time, one life, one culture? Let me know!

In other wordly events, I don't feature other pages here too often (though I do occasionally change the links at the bottom of that column you see on the right of this page) I want to pass on a link today - one of my web buddies Xeney (well, that's her web name!) recently did a total revamping of her site, and it looks pretty darned cool. Why not pop over for a visit.

And closer to home, I finally got StarCraft, and that evil game has been taking up a lot of my time - a lot - it's pretty addictive. All the gameplay of Warcraft II, with updated graphics, better gameplay, and a three part / three race series. So far, I've gotten to the 4th level of the Zerg Campaign, after finishing the terran one. DiscoDave wants to play me via Kali something bad - something about proving his manhood or something (hehehehehehe) but I'm keeping the poor lad stewing in his saliva at the moment. Maybe tomorrow night...

In yet other news, I did get some feedback on my cow story, thanks to all who took time to write. I'm glad that so many of you like reading my sordid and lame little tales, so I guess I'll keep them coming. My next one, which looks like the continuation of a series, is about the last party we held at the house featured in the Cow Story - the party was called "Bring Your Own PowerTools Party". It involves all the usual things - drunkeness, destruction, and even murder. And it's all true, I swear. Again, I have newspaper articles to back me up on this!

And as usual, I'm typing away at this again as I'm sitting in my newest, favoritist coffee house, Bean Around the World. So, with yet another extremely lame and rambling rant under my belt, I'll bid you adieu till next time!

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